Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Exploding Diaper Detail...


So at the risk of being too graphic, I am still posting this, as I am laughing about it and have been all day...
Peyton has been a little backed-up since the solid foods push of summer/fall '08. I backed off of the spoon required num-a-nums for a few days in the hopes that her bowels would return from their vacation, and purge what I knew was contained within their winding walls. (Notice the past-tense..)
So yesterday, I was packing away many "baby"things, as Peyton has decided to grow and she is much too mature for some objects in her room, things like tummy time mirrors, which have turned into mini step stools for her, and burp cloths, that have been more like decorations, mobiles, which just encourage her to reach higher, and the jumper, which is more like a prison to the eight month old who would much rather be crawling about and pulling herself up to other objects, rather than stuck in the confines of the jumper. I also packed away the breast pump and storage bags... which is an entirely different subject and very depressing to me...
I was pondering the fact that I really haven't had to cart around a burp cloth or two everywhere I go either within my home or elsewhere, like I did with the other two, and thought to myself, "Wow! She really has never been spitty.. I haven't had to deal with exploding poopie diapers at the same frequency as I am accustomed to, either."
Well, that one little thought was all it took, apparently.
This morning, while sitting in her high chair, and I was cleaning up breakfast, Peyton became slightly fussy. A little agitated, one might say. As I picked her up for her high chair, I discovered why. She had beautiful Peyton poop all up her back.
As I lay her down to change her, well, really to strip her of the stained PJ's, I discovered that it was not only just up her back, but up her front as well.
I proceeded to strip the poop soaked clothing from her now yellowish-greenish body, to prepare her for a much needed bath. I left her to sit on her bedroom floor, in her birthday suit, with some toys to play with whilst I drew her bath.
As I came back to her room to take her to the bathroom, I noticed a puddle on the floor. After I thought that everything possible could have exited her little body, I was shown how incorrect I was.
I went back to the bathroom, where there is a well placed linen closet with these awesome and much needed towels, to retrieve one of the said towels. I cleaned up the mess, and got back to the business at hand.
I was soon shown that even that was not the end of what was contained within that small explosive body...
I plopped her down in the bubble bath and warm water of the bathtub. She began to splash, as usual. I got a little wet, as usual. Then she smiled at me. Awwwe... I love that. Then she grunted. I held my breath. It was only a fart. But that bubbling gas fest was quickly followed by another grunt, a little more purposeful in sound, and soon thereafter, a shooting, squirting sound came forth. It reminded me of the F-16s that fly above my home just about every day.
The once clean, bubbly, heavenly, cleansing bath, was now that all too familiar yellowish greenish, Peyton poop color.
While she sat on the bathroom floor, with a towel wisely placed between her bare bum and the floor this time :), I drained the tub, cleaned it, re-poured her bath, and cleaned up the stinker, quickly, before any other shenanigans could take place on my watch.
Ahhh... will I ever learn to never say "never"?

4 comments:

Annie said...

That is too funny... I'm sure it isn't quite as funny when you are the one cleaning up the mess.

Ally0005 said...

Been there, done that. Oh the fun.

Rachael said...

That's funny! Jesse has done that same thing with Hayden when he was little. But it happened on his parents brand new carpet. Pea poo every where.

Jamie said...

Ha-Ha!! You make me laugh!! I think as mothers we've all experienced our own little poop story, but I think that is the best I've heard!!